Maybe.

Judaism welcomes the Jew-by-Choice!

In the case of a 16-17 year old it would depend on a number of factors, including but not limited to: Maturity, reasons for converting, parental support and ability to practice Judaism. Study is important but practice is also necessary.

This is very much an individual decision. Such an individual should seek out a rabbi to explore their options.  

The questioner is absolutely correct: We are all created in God’s image! No Biblical, Mishnaic or Talmudic source restricts a woman from holding a Torah. Customs did arise in many communities that did not allow women to touch the Torah, but such customs (minhag) are not law (halacha).

So why are some people so offended? Unfortunately because some people are resistant to any change. In some cases, tragically, I believe, Jewish Law is being misused to exercise power and control over women. We should all remember that the Torah was given to all of us; men and women created in God’s image.

We have all done it; wronged another in a manner in which the person we have harmed does not know who caused them the hurt. The harm could be relatively minor; sitting at a sporting event we spilled some of our drink on the coat of the person seated in front of us. The damage may be financial; unseen by anyone we accidently scratched another car in the parking lot. Or the wrong could have caused significant long term harm to another; we shared confidential information, inappropriately, resulting in the person we spoke about losing friendships or employment opportunities.

 

In such cases it seems so much easier to keep quiet rather than identify oneself to the wronged party. God alone knows of this wrongdoing, we tell ourselves, so confessing to God is sufficient. We think; the coat is stained, the car is scratched or the reputation is soiled – what good can come of me identifying myself as the guilty party?

 

The Mishnah in Tractate Yoma 8:9 teaches: “For sins committed against another, Yom Kippur (i.e. confessing to God) does not atone, until one appeases one’s fellow.” The Mishnah does not distinguish between a wrong known and unknown to the injured party. When we have wronged another we need to ask forgiveness.

 

Confessing to the one we have wronged accomplishes many things, especially if this acknowledgment and apology comes quickly. The sooner the harm is recognized the sooner and easier it is to repair the damage. Allowing the stain, be it physical (the coat) or personal (the reputation) to set, makes it more difficult to repair. Letting the wronged individual know that you are responsible for the damage may ease their hurt and encourage responsible behavior on their part. Hakarat ha-chet – recognition of the sin [one has committed], the first step of t’shuvah – repentance, creates an awareness on the part of the one who has caused the hurt to be more careful in the future.

 

There is one important exception to this making of amends; when doing so will cause the victim additional anguish. According to Rabbi Israel Salanter (see Rabbi Joseph Telushkin, A Code of Jewish Ethics, Volume I, p.165) “the desire to repent shouldn’t give us the right to cause emotional pain to our victim.” We are obligated, in such an instance, to repair any damages we caused if there is a way of doing so that will not cause further harm.

 

God, we are taught by our Rabbis, created repentance even before creating the world. Making use of this Divine blessing saves us from despair, helps us use guilt positively, reminds us that we can grow and change and it transforms our relationships with others and with God. Let us all use it well!

 

 

 

 

Donning Tallit and Tefillin I am ready each weekday morning to stand before my creator. As clothes make the man or woman; Tallit and Tefillin make me a davener (worshipper). Wrapping myself in the fabric of the Tallit; I feel enveloped by God’s presence. Looking upon the tzizzit, the fringes of the Tallit, I am reminded of the mitzvot; my responsibilities as a Jew. Binding the Tefillin upon my arm and around my head, I sense how my destiny is bound to my people and to God. I am reminded that my relationship with God is a loving caring partnership when I wrap the Tefillin strap around my hand and fingers reciting the ancient words of Hosea:  “I betroth myself to you forever, I betroth myself to you in Righteousness, in Justice, in Kindness and in Mercy; I betroth myself to you forever, and in that way I come to Know You.”

 

With Tallit and Tefillin I am dressed for my conversation with God and with the words of the Siddur. I cannot imagine morning prayers without them.

 

Should only men have this experience? Absolutely not!

 

The Talmud states, "Mikhal the daughter of King Saul used to wear Tefillin, and the sages did not protest" (Eruvin 96a). Many important sages of later periods including Rabbenu Tam (1100-1171) and Rabbi Zerahia haLevi (12th c. Provence) teach that women may wear Tallit and Tefillin and recite the blessings. The Rashba (1235-1310 Spain) states in a teshuva (responsum): "I agree with those who say that if they desire they can do all such mitzvot and recite the blessings, on the basis of Mikhal bat Shaul who used to wear Tefillin and they did not protest; indeed she did so with the approval of the sages and by the nature of the matter since she puts on Tefillin she blesses" (Teshuva 123).

 

Yes, of course, one can find the opposite opinion in the sources, but in our day, in communities where men and women participate equally in prayer I encourage women to enjoy the blessing of being wrapped by the Tallit and bound by the Tefillin.