All Questions Answered by
Rabbi Aaron Gaber

Question: I am planning a wedding that will just be a few friends and some immediate family members—basically, the Jewish equivalent of eloping. I come from a physically abusive home (with my mother), and I have not spoken to my mother in years (my parents divorced when I was very young, My father and I have a good relationship, and he also does not speak with my mother). My mother and I have intermittent contact sometimes about obtaining paperwork, but that’s the limit of our interactions. While I do not want to invite this person to my wedding, I worry about the long term consequences of such a choice. What are the Jewish considerations and obligations when making such a decision?
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Question: Is it ok to think about another woman while having sex with my wife? Thank you.
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Question: Children are commanded to honor their parents. How are parents commanded to treat their children? Is a parent who seeks to destroy their child through abuse still considered a parent? {Administrator's Note: Related questions about honoring parents are found on JVO at:]
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Question: My question is on the fear of G-d. I have always found this concept difficult to understand. For example I try to keep as many of the mitzvoth as I can because I want to and I am a follower of Judaism for the same reason not because of fear. I do not believe that G-d will destroy me if I do not follow a commandment. I believe in G-d and respect him, but I do not fear him. Is there a way to better understand this concept?
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Question: I am a non-denominationally affiliated Jew. I am not frum, but I am constantly working on observing more mitzvot and find myself enjoying different things about Reform, Conservative, and Orthodox communities. I want to know what the stance would be on me wearing a tallit katan. Up until this point I have not because I feel like it would be misrepresenting myself (I already wear a kippah and that alone often leads people to think i'm Hareidi even). It is not that I am offended by being seen as Orthodox, quite the opposite - I don't think I deserve to be viewed as that observant when I am not. I do not want to do something akin to chillul Hashem (or rather.... hillul frum communities? if that makes sense?) if I were ever to do something not-frum while donning them. However on the other hand I hold a firm belief that the mitzvot are not dependent on each other, and that every little step is progress. I also think that if a mitzvah or custom is going to make me better and has a meaningful significance to me, then it is appropriate to observe it. What are your thoughts, either on the points I mentioned, or new points all together in regards to a more "liberal" Jew wearing a tallit katan? Thank you for your time and knowledge.
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Question: I recently received an inquiry about serving as a sperm donor for an infertile couple. Is it a Mitzvah to do so? What do Jewish traditions, thought, and values advise on this matter?
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